Adulting 101: How to do laundry

Students at McNicholas high school are provided with an education second to none. At the end of their four years of high school, students can write a superb five paragraph essay and solve to find the variable x in any math equation. However, the mainstream curriculum often falls short of addressing everyday life skills such as how to fry and egg or how to clean the bathroom. These tasks are beyond a teacher’s pay grade, but they are still remarkably important. Allow yourself to be enlightened and peel back the curtain surrounding adulthood as you learn how to tackle the holy grail of all life skills: How to do the laundry.

Separate the Clothes

While this step is seemingly insignificant, it is absolutely crucial to divide up clothing into lights and darks before proceeding to the following steps. There is a fine line between pulling the laundry out of the dryer to find beautiful white clothes as soft and lovely as huge puffy clouds, and discovering that the red t-shirt that snuck in with the rest of the clothing has turned your favorite pair of shorts an uneven shade of pink.

Load Washing Machine and Add Detergent

After separating the colors from the whites, it’s time to fill the washing machine three quarters of the way full with dirty laundry. Next, add your detergent of choice. For those of you wondering, yes, detergent is the giant, usually orange jug or box of liquid or powder from the non-edible section of the grocery store. Measure out the detergent before adding it to the machine so you don’t have to lift it like a power lifter over your precious clothing.

Select Water Temperature and Start

At this point in the washing process, the machine’s many knobs and buttons may begin to look like something out of a science fiction movie in which robots take over the earth. I assure you that you can overcome this plight by remembering this rule: hot water for white clothing, and cold water for dark clothing. The machine may also play twenty questions with you, and ask you the size of your load of laundry, and whether or not you chose to include fabric softener (the stuff that has a picture of a teddy bear on the front). Respond accordingly to the questions. And then start. After the clothing has been thoroughly washed by the robot, move the clothing over to the dryer.

Operate the Dryer

The procedure for using the dryer is similar to that of the washing machine, except you are infinitely more likely to realize that the shirt you need for the event you are attending tonight is only half way dry in the dryer, and you must check to see if it is wearable despite its slight dampness every five minutes or so. Your dryer may ask you a plethora of questions (maybe even how dry you want your clothes) but it is easiest to set the dryer to “normal dry” and then press start. And before hitting start, be sure to check the dryer’s lint trap.  Peel back the lint, throw it away, and replace the lint trap. Failing to do this before each load could result in a buildup of lint, thus causing a fire.

Wait

Perhaps the most agonizing step, waiting for the clothing to dry may take anywhere from thirty minutes to fifty years depending on how often you decide to check if your clothes have dried completely.

Fold the Clothes

Contrary to the belief that you must have mastered the art of origami to be able to fold clothing, the process is quite simple… unless you decided not to fold the clothes and live out of your clothing basket in the same four outfits every week. To make your life easier, here is a diagram to aid your origami studies.

shirt

Photo courtesy of www.pinterest.com.

pants

Photo courtesy of www.dailymail.co.uk.


One thought on “Adulting 101: How to do laundry

  1. Can this article be added to the mandatory reading list at McNick? It’s content is of the utmost importance. In fact, this could almost be a procedure for a lab assignment. The students could do this at home and write a lab report analyzing the results and the positive outcomes that doing this would have in family life.

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