McNicholas teachers give advice on dating


Valentine’s Day has arrived and love is in the air. It is no secret that high school students date. Over the years the rules for dating have changed, and McNicholas teachers were more than willing to share their advice on dating.

Science teacher John Chadwell believes in chivalry and being old fashioned. He said that the person who asked for the date should pay for everything and that guys should open doors for their date. “I think men should open doors for their dates – not that women can’t do it themselves, but chivalry should still count for something,” Chadwell said.

Be genuine with other people; if they don’t like it, then it’s not worth it. Chadwell supports being genuine and not taking things too seriously. “If it isn’t working out, end it gracefully, not via text, and find someone who you have better chemistry with,” Chadwell advised.

English teacher Ashley Markesbery said it’s important to be genuine and not be someone else. “I would try to be who I thought guys wanted me to be, but that always ended up making me unhappy,” Markesbery said.

“Now, if you don’t like me, then who cares, on to the next one because I’d rather be happy and single than in a relationship where I felt pressured to be someone I’m not,” Markesbery added.

A common piece of advice is to find someone who makes the person feel complete. Religion teacher Teresa Davis said that a person is already whole and does not need someone to complete them. “Be with someone who makes you a better you,” Davis said. “Not one that changes you.”

Communication is big part of dating. Whether it’s texting or calling, communication is a key to dating. Religion teacher Sam Roflow believes in communicating face to face. “We need to actually talk with each other where we are truly present to the other,” Roflow said. Roflow added that communication should happen with no interruptions.  “That is how you get to know someone and be in a real relationship,” Roflow concluded.

History teacher Frank Lowden and English teacher Jeff Mulvey both agreed that trust is important for dating. If a situation feels uncomfortable and things are moving too fast, people should trust in themselves and slow it down. “If you feel it is moving faster than you like, or if changes in plans within the date give you concern, trust yourself that it could potentially be a bad situation and take immediate steps to get home,” Mulvey said.

Preparing for a date can be stressful and tricky. Lowden’s tip for preparing is to make sure the person checks that he or she has extra money in case of an emergency. “Make sure you keep some ‘Mad’ money stowed away where no one but you knows about it,” Lowden said. “That way if you get ‘mad’ at your date, you can call a taxi to take you home.”

Markesbery’s tip for a date is to always be nice and make sure to relax before a date. “If it’s meant to be, it will work out; if it’s not meant to be, it won’t work out no matter how much you force it or how hard you try,” Markesbery advised.

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